Welcome to the World

Over 130 million babies are born each year. This year, Jeremiah Jacob is among them. Poor little tyke was wrestled into the world yesterday evening. Not a moment too soon for my sister. Though I think Jeremiah might have preferred his previous home. That's grandkid number sixteen for my parents. Each with his or her own personality and temperament. Funny how different and how alike people who are related can be. Cousins often exhibit each other's gestures and facial expressions more so than siblings do. When they're babies they seem most connect to the family - little blank slates whose features and expressions can be attributed to a sister, a mother, a grandparent. Of course, they are not blank slates. They are individuals, vitally connected and yet completely separate from family. As they grow, their individuality becomes apparent, their uniqueness more defined.

The same is true of our characters. When we begin to write a story, the hero or heroine may seem almost cookie-cutterish, perhaps modeled off of someone we know, or another character we've created. Over time, as the story unfolds and this character's life unfolds with it, s/he becomes an individual, unique and well-defined.

At least that's what's supposed to happen.

It's important that in trying to create real characters we don't create caricatures. Over-blown, over-drawn, cartoonish figures who react and over react to the point that they are (at best) unbelievable or (at worst) unlikable.

I know I've blogged about characterization before, but there is no story without the solid backbone of good characters. Plot and writing skills aside, characterization is what drives your story and makes your readers want to keep right on reading.

Procrastination and Other Things That Keep Me From Writing

I love writing. I really do. Creating stories and characters, crafting paragraphs and sentences. Those are things I find a lot of pleasure in.

The funny thing is, when push comes to shove and I need to sit down and write, I can always think of twenty other things that need doing RIGHT NOW.

For example - windows. Ask my husband about the last time I actually cleaned the outside of our windows and he'll probably laugh. For good reason. I don't know if I've ever cleaned the outside of the windows. Today, when the temperature is cold enough to freeze the Windex on the glass, I pulled in those wonderful windows and shined them up (which was hard to do with the window cleaner actually frozen). I also did (in no particular order) - a load of laundry (stuffed animals no less....gotta get rid of those dust mites), the wall near my steps (gotta get rid of those fingerprints), fifteen minutes of color comparison (during which time I contemplated paint for our rec room), seven minutes staring in the fridge thinking about cleaning it out (which I did not do).

Yes, friends, I am the queen of procrastination.

The problem is, when you get to the place I'm in and have editors waiting for those words you sweat and ponder over, it doesn't pay to procrastinate. And I mean that literally. The sooner you finish and move onto something else, the more lucrative your writing career will be.

So, if you're in the habit of procrastinating, now is as good a time as any to break it. Set your goals. Stick to them.

And don't clean your windows when it's 20 degrees outside.

Writer's Woe - A Poem

My writing stinks,
My writing's horrid,
It lacks passion,
It isn't torrid.
It's like this poem,
Blah and yucky,
Muddy, Moldy,
and quiet Mucky.

Do worse if you can,
I dare you,
I do,
And I'll send a copy of
Little Girl Lost to you.


How's that for bad poetry.

Top it and I really will send you a copy of LITTLE GIRL LOST.

Why I Really, Truly, Really Stink at Writing

Or.....Even authors can be in pits of despair of their work.

It may seem that you're the only one looking at those labored over word-filled pages and wondering- "Did I really write this crap?"

Rest assured, friends, you are NOT alone.

I'm right there with you, reading back over the proposal I sent in a month ago and wondering....Why did I write that? What was I thinking? Could it be any worse?

I suppose it could be worse. However it could also be a whole lot better. Take for example sentence one page two - She'd left the light on.

How basic, how inane could it get? You'd think a woman who's got seven books under her belt would have a little more upmh in her writing. But no....She'd left the light on. Why don't I just narrate the entire story?...She'd left the light on. She saw a shadow out of the corner of her eye. She screamed. She jumped. She punched him in the eye with the carrot she'd been munching. He fell, the carrot protruding from his pupil perilously.

Yep, that would go over really well with my editors and my readers.

Here's the thing, though, I can throw in the towel because I am obviously not cut out to be an author. Or I can keep fighting for the right words, keep working toward that always elusive perfection, keep trusting that my imperfections can still be used for Him. Not just in writing, in life.

Out of the pit and back to the work.

His blessings on you today!

Do You Really Want to Know?

According to my husband, I need to get back in here and do some blogging. Seeing as how it has been months since I've blogged, I guess he's right.

What do I have to say?

Absolutely nothing.

Except this. If you have a deadline for sometime in January, do not plan a babyshower for November, commit to working a gymnastic meet in December, sign your kids up for piano recitals in Nov, Dec, Jan, get volunteered (and stupidly agree) to run the children's choir for the Christmas Cantata, teach Sunday School, decide you really have to keep homeschooling through most of the vacation, and tell your agent that yes, you can write a continuity that has a proposal due in December.

If you do all those things, do NOT get sick. Because if you do, you're going to get really behind. Once you get behind you're going to get sick again trying to catch up. Which will make you more behind.

Good news is, eventually you will catch up and get well.

However, your poor house will be the worse for it.

Along with this blog, I'm blogging on Eharlequin this week. We're discussing my new release, LITTLE GIRL LOST. Come visit me there and you'll learn lots about The Secret of Stoneley continuity. Read my or Lenora's book (which is first in the series)and find clues to the story's mystery and you'll win a signed copy of my book.

http://community.eharlequin.com/webx?14@140.3mTSapVM0WM.124586@.4a83f277

Tomorrow: Why I Really, Truly, Really Stink at Writing.

Writing a Book is Like Cooking a Turkey

It's really easy for it to be overdone.

You know what I mean (or maybe you don't). You glance into the oven, prick the poor dead bird (yes, that's what I call the turkey every year), think that it might need to be cooked a little more. One thing leads to another (potatoes, kids, husband, cats all causing trouble) and before you know it a half hour has passed and poor-dead-bird is still in the oven. You hurry to take it out, praying it isn't bone dry and inedible. Once you taste it you're both relieved and disappointed because it isn't bone dry and it isn't inedible, but it isn't quite the moist, delicious poor-dead-bird you'd hoped it would be.

How, you might ask, does this relate to writing a book?

It doesn't, but I can make this analogy work and I will. :0)

I've been reading a lot of manuscripts lately and have found a big problem with one in particular. Go ahead, ladies, panic! LOL. No, it's not yours. It's...mine. With so many deadlines looming it's inevitable that I'll have to spend hours of sleep time awake, hunched over my computer, staring at my own worse-thing-I've-ever-written book. And, yes, that's what I call every manuscript I write. As I read, I often find that I've overdone a scene. While not precisely wrong, the conversation or action is not precisely right either. Thus, the taste isn't exactly bad, but it's not exactly what I was hoping for (see, told you I could get the analogy to work!).

Perhaps you've faced this in your own writing. You're reading through and you think - this seems a little off. There's nothing obviously wrong, it's just not as right as you want it to be. If this happens, don't try to cover the spot up with a ladle of gravy or a pile of dressing. Unlike turkey, a manuscript's problems can't be masked with wonderful side dishes. Instead, ask yourself two questions - Is this what s/he would say here? Is this how s/he would act (react) here? Be honest with yourself. Use everything you know about human nature and your own characters to come up with the truth. Otherwise, asking the questions will be an exercise in futility.

The key to creating great stories lies in creating believable situations and characters. If you can't answer yes to both those questions, the scene must be rewritten to be a more realistic reflection of life.

I've got an example of some really bad writing saved on my laptop (yes, it's my own). If I get back here today, I'll post it along with the rewritten scene. If nothing else, it should give us all a good laugh before we go into the hectic holiday season!

Where Do I Go From Here?

In the world of publishing, that's a question that's often asked. Published or unpublished, most authors get to a point where they wonder what direction their writing should take. Often this comes in the wake of rejection, bad sales, or disappointing reviews. At such times, it may be tempting to turn to something new, try a another genre, play with different POV. Maybe give up on writing altogether.

There's nothing inherently wrong with going a different direction when we hit a brick wall. Sometimes it's exactly what we should do. More often than not though, finding a way around the wall is going to take a whole lot longer than knocking it down. All we need are the tools to do so.

The fact is, the industry is tough and fickle. Jumping from genre to genre in hopes of getting it right is a waste of effort and energy. When we have passion for what we write, but are feeling uncertain about the market or our own ability to be successful in it, the answer isn't to give up on our dreams, but to push harder. That means different things to different people. To me, pushing harder means putting myself out there more (and boy do I hate being center stage). It means setting goals that are reasonable even while I dream of bigger things. It means accepting where I am now, embracing it, but still looking forward with an eye to next month, next year, even next decade. It doesn't mean I will never switch genres or try something new. It means that I will keep doing what I'm doing while I'm exploring other options (like longer books or family drama).

For others, pushing harder may mean taking classes, reading books on writing, attending conferences, entering contests. It may mean asking for advice, joining critique groups, or putting a manuscript in front of a freelance editor.

Or it may simply mean continuing in exactly the same way, trusting (as Joshua did) that the wall will eventually fall down.

Write for Him.

An Awesome Opportunity

SH Romantic Suspense EDITOR PITCH Challenge
Rae-eHarlequin - 10:41pm Nov 12, 2006
Rae_cy@yahoo.com

We're at it again! And this time, we've got another of your favorite lines for you to send your inspirational romantic suspense to! Steeple Hill Romantic Suspense is looking for YOUR manuscript and Editor Krista Stroever will be on hand to take your pitch!

To enter, send a 1 to 2 line logline of your manuscript to Hosty Rae by December 6th.

Five entries will be chosen by Krista Stroever and those will be announced on December 15th.

Pitches will happen the week of * December 18th, at *1pm EST. But read the rules below to ensure your entry can be accepted.

• You MUST be able to enter and post inside the eHarlequin.com chat room. If you are unable to use the chat room and your submission is chosen, we will be unable to offer you another venue option and it will be unfair to an entrant who is able.

• You MUST have a completed manuscript that is targeted to Steeple Hill Romantic Suspense. Editors have the option to request partials or fulls but aren't accepting across the board.

• You MUST be available at the given chat time. As stated above, we will be unable to offer another venue or time option.


• Please include your member name and your full name along with your submission.


Logline Specifications


Challenge Specifics: This challenge is 1 or 2 lines (as written by the author, please gramatically ensure the sentences do not run-on in order to fit more in.). This should not look like a large paragraph.

Challenge Description: A logline is a 1 or 2 line description of your ENTIRE ms, primarily what marketing hooks each ms might have (ie: Beauty & The Boss, Cowboy Lover, Pregnant Bride) but it's more than that. You will need to lay out the hooks, the conflicts, the characters and the plot premise concisely.

In a query, it would go at the top of the letter, for a pitch, it might be all you use, and you have a better chance of getting editorial attention if you know this skill well because they now have a speedy way of discerning what you're trying to do in the story.

Also loglines help keep the query pages short and you can be more expansive in the synop. (I've also found that if you put it all into those two lines, you now have a small thesis statement from which to build the synop itself.)

EX
When pregnant Lindsay Lawson is left at the altar, no one is more suprised than Hank Handler, the man she works for, that he steps in as the role of the groom. But is the handsome, quiet rancher there to help her save face...or does it have something to do with the long-standing rivalry between their families?


* these are tentative dates and the actual one will be placed in here.
* Only non-published writers may apply.

Balance Anyone?

For years, I've thought my biggest problem as a writer (aside from the fact that I'm homeschooling four kids and can barely find the time to do it!) was pacing. Dragging stories, dragging scenes, dragging chapters. My first drafts are always filled with all three. Yesterday, I had an epiphany. I realized that my real problem isn't pacing, it's balance.

In order to keep a romantic suspense story moving along, each scene should further both the romance and the suspense. In my case, I've also got to build in a faith element. Every chapter must flow smoothly and bring the hero and heroine closer to all three things - the resolution of the suspense/mystery, the realization that s/he can't live without the hero/heroine, and a deeper understanding of her/his relationship with God.

That's a lot of stuff to fit into a chapter. Done wrong, the details of each element may become either overwhelming (which slows down the story), or none existent (which prevents the story from building in depth). Good balance of elements within the story leads to smooth transitions that allow our readers to say, "Oh, yes, of course that's what she would do (feel, think, say)." It also creates a story that compels the reader to turn pages as she (or he) lives each moment, each realization with the hero and heroine.

And, of course, that's what we want.

As you move through your second draft, ask yourself how each scene furthers the elements of your story. Work hard to tighten your writing so that it doesn't distract from the story. Above all, don't be afraid to make changes as you strive to create a compelling and well-balanced manuscript!

Playing Nice With Others

I use to say that to be a success at writing a person had to -

A. Have some natural story telling ability.
B. Be a better than average writer.
C. Be persistent.
D. Have a good attitude.

It seems there's something I forgot. Apparently, a successful writer should also know how to play nice with others. Or so my agent informed me. Though not in so many words. According to Steve, my editor said that Harlequin wanted to offer me a contract for another continuity story because, "Shirlee knows how to play nice with others."

Now, perhaps you think that comment belongs more on a grade school report card then in a conversation about an author. Me? I was glad to know that my editor thinks so highly of my ability to work with a variety of people. The thing about a continuity is that each author writes a book, but each book is intricately connected to the other books in the series. Lack of communication, unwillingness to bend and change, hard-lined stances on one's own vision of the story don't work when authors are creating a six book project. What works is a willingness to listen, eagerness to tackle problems as a member of a team, and an ability to see the book you're creating as a group project rather than an individual acheivement. Doing those things is like playing nice on the playground - it creates friendships, champions, and an atmosphere of fun and accomplishment.

Even if you're not published and doubt you'll be offered the chance to write a continuity in the near future, this lesson is a good one to keep in mind. As much as good writing and great story telling can sell your book, a bad attitude and an inablity to accept that you're just one member of a very large team can ruin your career.

I suppose in some ways it's about being humble, about knowing that the books we create can only be their best with the help of others. After all, no one likes arrogance and everyone wants to be acknowledged for what they do. But mostly, it's about living lives that are testimonies to what we believe. It's about having the same gentle spirit as Christ. A spirit that accepts, that appreciates, that loves. It's about being the people He wants us to be.

And really, that's the only way to true success in anything!

Play nice!

Maybe You're Wondering

Where I've been. What I've been doing.

In answer - I'm here. I'm doing the same thing I was doing a month ago when I posted. Teaching, cleaning, writing. Writing, teaching, cleaning. Cleaning. Writing. Teaching.

Actually, I do more teaching and writing than cleaning, but since you don't know where I live and can't come for an unannounced visit, let's pretend that my house is spotless, my kids are all seven grades ahead of their peers, and my writing has sprouted wings and is soaring. Isn't fantasy grand?

Reality is much more messy, cluttered, chaotic.

And maybe, just maybe, it's more fun, too.

After all, there's something to be said for the unknown, for facing each new day knowing that it won't go exactly as planned, for looking at your kids and knowing they're going to say something, do something, act in some bizarre way that you didn't expect, for writing a manuscript that just won't fall in line with your carefully plotted vision. There's something to be said and that something isn't all bad. Spotless is nice. Organized is great. Success is wonderful. But, like money, those things can't provide joy, love, or faith.

So maybe it's time for all us over-achiever, supermom, superdad, gotta-have-everything-just-right people to let go, let God, and let life happen while we laugh and cry, run and dance.

And enjoy every blessed moment of it.

Just something to think about on this too-warm November day.

BTW, I just sold my ninth book to Steeple Hill. Wow! I can hardly believe I've come this far.

I've Got Nothing

My family has an email loop. This has become important as some of us have left Maryland and some have careers that keep our lives too busy for phone conversation (which really aren't that hard to make time for...And you know who I'm talking to). Email has become a very quick way to share bits and pieces of our lives. The other day, my mom sent an email out. It said, "Mom's got nothing." I laughed at that, because my mom has been traveling all over creation (she's been to Arizona, to Branson, to Massachusetts, PA, to Australia...the list goes on), visiting sick friends, coordinating meals for families at her church. She's been on a bowling league for years and exercises daily. She's got a spoiled dog, a devoted husband (even if he does drive her crazy), five kids, fifteen and six/ninths grandkids.

Basically, she's got a whole lot more than nothing. She just couldn't think of anything to say. I thought that was quite funny.

Until today.

Today, I'VE GOT NOTHING. No witty words of advice. No pithy stories about the writing life. No interesting tidbits to share.

And that doesn't really worry me, because I've come to the conclusion that having nothing comes from having everything. A life filled to bursting with activities and errands and chores. And, most importantly, people. I realized the other day, that in a very few short months I'll have fifteen nieces and nephews. Nothing? I think not. I've got - Jude, Caleb, Seth, Emma Grace (my own darlings), and then...in no particular order...Skylar, Trey, Joshua, Danielle, Katie, Baby boy Sharo, Kai, Noah, Jake, John, Elijah, Evelyn Grace, Brianna, Elijah, and Amirah (yes, there are two Elijahs in the family). I've got three sisters, a brother, all their wonderful spouses. I've got my fantastic (mostly) husband and his two sisters. My parents. My mother-in-law.

Nothing? I think not.

And, yet, I have absolutely nothing to say.

Or maybe I do. Maybe, I just want to say - life is short. Enjoy it. Enjoy the people God has put in it with you. Cherish the moments, the days, and the years. Make sure you have nothing to regret. Write your books with passion, but live your life with even more. Talent is great and must be used, but people are our mission and our calling. Sure, my books touch hearts and lives, but if I'm not touching the hearts and lives of the people I speak to every day, I am failing in the most important calling I've been given.

Should we write? Yes. YES. YES. Should we do it with passion and energy? Of course.

But more than that, we should love those God has put in our lives. If that sometimes means giving up writing time and writing opportunities....so be it. There is always tomorrow for that sentence, that scene, that page, but missed opportunities to show that we care can never be regained.

Stranger in the Shadows

After three days of back and forth, that's the title my editors approved for my sixth Lakeview book. I'm glad to have it titled and slotted, but it always takes me so long to get use to the titles. Not that that's a particularly bad title. My dear friend Brenda is stuck with TRUSTING HIM for her August 2007 release (a book you should all buy because it's an awesome story). Now, maybe you think TRUSTING HIM isn't bad. I don't think it's bad, but her original title was ROSE COLORED GLASSES. Personally, I would be much more likely to buy a book titled ROSE COLORED GLASSES than I would one titled TRUSTING HIM (but I will be buying many copies of the book to give as gifts, because it is a GREAT book despite the fact that I think the title is a tad boring).

Of course, that's just me.

One way or another, titles matter. They tell us something about the books. Not just the story, but the tone of them. My friend Debbie Clopton writes a really cute series for Love Inspired - The Mule Hollow series. Her books have cute titles and cutes cover - THE TROUBLE WITH LACEY BROWN, AND BABY MAKES FIVE, THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME, DREAM A LITTLE DREAM. It all fits together in a nice package that tells a reader what to expect when s/he opens the book.

Of course, authors don't make the final decision about titles. Well, maybe Nora and Linda and Debbie do, but authors like me don't. Our editors brainstorm with us, we come up with a list of titles, eventually one of those titles is chosen. And the book and the author are stuck with it.

So, don't get too attached to your working title. If you're blessed and that book appears on store shelves, it may have something completely different on the cover. Not that you'll care. Just having the book there will make up for having to change the title!

And I have to say, I've been very, very fortunate. All my titles are cool. Kind of mysterious and rather mainstream sounding. There was only one I really didn't like and now it's just about my favorite. Can you guess which one that was?

So, anyone want to share her working title?

No, I Can't Spell

So, we can just get that out in the open. I really can't. Spell, I mean. I also can't copy from one page to another. Well, that's not quite accurate. I can copy if I already know the words or numbers, but if it's something I haven't seen before - a strange word, a new telephone number, I'm likely to make a lot of mistakes. To complicate matters, I'm a comma addict. I love using them. Even in inappropriate places. Even in places where they confuse the writing. I don't know the rules about using commas, and I only kind of sort of maybe care about them. Thus the freelance editor.

But this isn't a blog about freelance editors. This is a blog about using the gifts I do have. If I spent all my time worrying about my weaknesses, I wouldn't accomplish a thing. I'd sit in front of my computer, questioning every comma and looking up every word. I'd be frozen in place by fear and the sinking, sliding feeling of inadequacy that often tries to take hold.

So, I've just got to accept my weaknesses and let them go, knowing that God is greater than all those things.

How easy is that to say? The key is to do it. And, yes, I'm talking to you.

I know what you're worried about. You think you won't meet editor and agent expectations. You worry that your writing isn't polished enough. You look at your work and think it's pond scum (yeah, I've got a thing for that lately. I've been seeing a lot of scummy ponds). You have a synopsis you're sure is the worst ever written and you just know it's going to keep you from getting published. You're editing, editing, editing, looking for errors, counting them up in your head, groaning at all the mistakes, all the imperfections. All the things that will prevent your story from being told the way it should be. The way you wish you could tell it.

But I know something else. No matter the problems with your manuscript, your synopsis, your life, they are nothing compared to the beauty of knowing you are doing absolutely what God wants you to do. He doesn't care about those mistakes and inadequacies. He cares about relationship. And that's what He's asking for. Not just tiny little moments of prayer and time, but a daily commitment to seeking His will, to knowing Him better, and to being the person He means you to be.

So, write. Write as if you have no weaknesses. Write as if your story is one that simply must be told. Write as if all the effort, time and energy will be worth it even if the book never sees the light of day. Write because you must. For Him.

And let Him take care of the rest.

What Really Matters

While we sweat bullets over our proposals, queries, etc, while we wonder and worry and wait, I thought I'd talk about what really matters in the writing business.

Great stories told well will certainly get you a slot in a publishing house's line-up of books, but what really matters is attitude.

Maybe you're surprised. Maybe you disagree. Maybe you're right on both counts, but this is my blog, so I'm going to call it like I see it and what I see is that attitude is a good part of what it takes to make it as an author (and in life).

Sure, sales matter. Sure getting those books sold matters. In the long run though, when we're at the end of this life, what's going to matter isn't how many books we sold, how much money we made, whether or not we were bestsellers or total flops. What is going to matter is how many lives we touched, how many people we loved, how many people loved us back, and (most importantly) how well we did the work God gave us. Many of us consider writing our gift and our calling. I can't argue that it isn't, but I will say that our most important calling is to love God and then to love others. That means having servant spirits, seeking ways to lift up those around us, working every job with good heart attitudes.

That's hard. So much harder than writing a book. So much harder than writing a synopsis. So much harder than crafting a beautiful story. Having that good attitude no matter the circumstances means sacrificing self, it means looking beyond now and seeing the future as God does.

Personally, I think hard is an understatement. Sometimes I find it nearly impossible. But it isn't. The Spirit that dwells in me is greater than anything the world dishes out.

So, while I work on my latest project, while I critique and listen and wonder at the way things work out, I strive to keep what's important foremost in my mind - serving God, serving others, having the kind of attitude that is a blessing to those around me.

In the end, that's all that will really matter. The rest will burn away. And when that happens, I pray we will all be left with the beautiful riches that come from a life lived for Him.

Pay Back Time!

I had a blast at ACFW. Met lots of new people. Got to reconnect with old friends, good friends, and sisters of the heart. I laughed. Laughed some more. Stayed up waaaay too late.

And now it's time to get cracking.

Here's the trouble with taking time off writing - it's so hard to get back into the swing of things. I mean, let's be honest, we've all got lives aside from writing. Some of us work outside the home, some of us work from home, some of us homeschool kids. Then there's laundry, dishes, floors. BATHROOMS. The list goes on, but I won't depress myself by continuing. So, we come back from a wonderful conference feeling refreshed, renewed, and ready to continue pursuing our writing goals, but that means writing and writing means hard work above and beyond all the work we already do. Worse, it means facing our demons. You know the ones. They whisper into our minds and insist that everything we write is sludge from the bottom of a stagnant pond. If you've ever smelled sludge from the bottom of a stagnant pond, you know just how much it stinks.

So, for those of you who (like me) are having a hard time facing the computer, the WIP, the words that refuse to flow, here's a bit of advice (free of charge!). Think one sentence at a time, one paragraph, one page. Focus on moving forward rather than looking back. And never ever worry about making your work fit a particular publishing house or agent. If you're preparing to submit requested material, focus on your strengths, work on your weaknesses. Tell the story of your heart the best way you can without all the rules cluttering your head.

Most importantly, trust God. Self can do so little. God can do so much. Trust His timing, His perfect will, and believe that no matter the outcome you are walking safe in His love and acceptance.

If you have questions about submitting, queries, synopsis writing feel free to drop me a note. shirlee@shirleemccoy.com

ACFW Conference Here I Come

Maybe.

Or maybe I'll pretend to go and just chill out by myself in a Maryland hotel for a while. That way I get to avoid:

A. Planes (why did man ever feel the need to fly? It's just not natural.)
B. Crowds (I really am an introvert. I'm just really good at pretending otherwise)
C. Humiliation (which I'm sure I will experience during the late night chats I'm co-presenting).


Of course, I've already paid for the conference and plane ticket, so I will be going. And I'm actually looking forward to it in a slightly neurotic, very anxious way. I only go to one conference a year, so this is my time to be Shirlee-the-author. A time when I feel confident about who I am and what I've accomplished in the publishing world. It's a time when I get to meet new people and reconnect with friends. A time when I can sit and think and listen and learn. When I refocus and renew my passion for what I do. It's a time when I know absolutely beyond a shadow of a doubt that I'm doing what God want me to do, and that writing really is my calling and my gift.

So, yeah, I'd kind of like to find a hotel in Ocean city and spend four days at the deserted beach, but I think I'll just go ahead and get on the plane tomorrow.

Look out Dallas! Here I come!

Ready Or Not?

Not.

It's true. While you're all scrambling to perfect pitches and one sheets, packing clothes, making lists of what's needed and what's not, I'm doing nothing. Well as much of nothing as a homeschool mother of four/author/wife can do. I've not packed, not shopped, not thought about anything to do with the story I'd like to pitch to a certain editor that I'm hoping to meet.

This, gang, is called avoidance. If I don't think about it, it won't happen. Of course, it will happen. Come Thursday morning, I'll be boarding that plane and flying to Dallas. Do I know what I'll be wearing? NO. Do I know if I'm bringing my laptop? NO. Do I know who I'm flying out with? Well, yes, actually that is one thing I do know and have planned for.

Why do I bring this up? Because, whether or not I'm ready, my trip to Dallas will happen. That's life, isn't it? We can choose to tackle it head on, or we can choose to hide our heads in the sand, but one way or another, it's going to happen.

So, whatever it is you're avoiding, putting off, refusing to acknowledge, take a page from my book of lessons learned - it doesn't pay to avoid. Today, I go shopping, I get out my suitcase, and I finish the blasted proposal that just won't DIE. What is it that you need to do today?

Here's what I know

God is in control.

Through heartache, trouble, trial, disappointment. He is in control.

Through every moment, every tear, every triumph. He is in control.

He has promised to never leave us. Never forsake us. We can choose to embrace that or to doubt it, but it doesn't change the truth. He is in control.

How obvious. How true. How often overlooked. The simple idea that no matter what, no matter where, no matter how broken, wounded, joyful, or quiet, He is in that moment.

And He is in control.

Next week, many of us will be heading to Dallas for the ACFW conference. We're putting all our ducks in a row, making beautiful one sheets and practicing well-worded hooks. We've prepared proposals, thought through meetings, perhaps even written a script of what we want to say. And that's good. Being prepared, having a plan, working toward a goal, those are things we must do to move toward our dreams and His plans.

But in the end, it's His will, not ours. His timing, not ours. His purpose, His plan, and His perfect knowledge of what is best. Not ours.

That doesn't mean we have to understand it. It doesn't mean we even have to like it. It just is what it is.

I knew this when I started the journey toward publication, but my experiences as an author have brought this truth into sharp focus. I can choose to question, to worry, to wait with anxiety and trepidation, or I can release those things to God and let Him work out the details of where I'm headed and what He will do with the gift He's granted me. Even more, I can grasp my career with both hands, holding onto it with tight fists and determination, or I can let it go, watching it float on air breathed by His warm and wonderful grace. In the end, I cannot know where this journey is leading me. I can only trust that His will is best, His knowledge, His foresight, and His love for me determining the best path for my feet to trod.

Wherever you're going, whatever gift you are trying to use for Him, I pray that you will rest in the assurance that He is in control.

Silence

That's what I remember most about 9/11.

The world went silent, as if even the birds and animals held their breath and waited. Sometimes I think they are still waiting, wondering what further atrocities mankind can visit on itself. I know I am.

I've heard people blame God, religion, politics for what happened that day. I think it is our nature as humans to look for causes so that we can find solutions. Sadly, there is no solution. What happened has happened before on both smaller and larger scales. It will continue to happen until the end of time.

Maybe I sound like a pessimist. I'm not. I'm a realist. I look at humanity and I see the truth - there is both great good and great evil in the world. And perhaps even in each of us. No one is exempt from anger, hatred, and bigotry. We each have preconceived ideas, deep rooted insecurities, and the need to survive. Created in the imagine of God, we have minds that imagine, create, and question. Because of that, we have the ability to build up, to tear down, to pull together, and to divide.

Did 911 change me as a person? Yes. I no longer believe that safety is assured. I look for exits in stores, movie theaters, and malls, always, always planning how best to get myself and my children out if there is an attack. I will never fly without fear. Nor will I see a plane in pristine blue sky without remembering 9/11.

But it's changed me for the better, as well. Before, I thought heroes were for fiction. That true heroic acts were few and far between. Today, I know the truth. That there is a hero in every one of us. That when push comes to shove, people will reach out and lend a hand. More, they will sacrifice all they have to save people they've never met. They will work. They will fight. They will even die.

And the beauty of that is far more than can be expressed in words. I think, in the end, that beauty far outweighs the horror and ugliness of what transpired five years ago. What man meant for evil God used for good, bringing together a widely diverse nation and showing us the power of the human spirit and the truth of the hero that dwells in the heart of every man.