A Day in the Life

Yesterday, I received word that the proposal for RUNNING SCARED had been approved. This is the second book in my Heroes for Hire miniseries, and I've been anxiously waiting to hear whether or not my editors liked what I'd sent in.

Now that I've got the go-head, I can write the remainder of the story.

But first I needed to clean my house.

And do six loads of laundry.

And make lunch for five kids.

And clean up after lunch.

I marshaled the troops and gave them the call to action. Twelves hands (my husband had to work this morning) make light work. At least they're supposed to. The boys are young men now, and they're quite good at doing the assigned tasks. The girls....well, let's just say I had to follow along and clean up after their clean up. It was cute watching them, though.

Now the house is clean, the kids are happily playing, the husband is practicing for praise band...and I am free to write.

For a while.

I'm sure the peace won't last long. But, really, that's just the way I like it!

Facing the Doubt Demon Head-on

Before I got published, I lived in a world of dreams and aspirations. I wrote manuscripts with the hope that one day I'd see them in book form. I hoped, but I wasn't sure. I doubted, but I also believed.

Fast forward a few years, and I'm a published author with fourteen books to my name and three more contracted. One would think that at this point, I'd be filled with confidence.

The fact is, I struggle more with doubt now than I did before STILL WATERS hit the book stores. That is not to say I don't believe in my abilities. It is simply that I worry more about whether or not my writing is up to snuff. Before, I only had to angst about editors (only? Ha!) and critique partners and what their opinions of my work would be. Now, I must consider readers' opinions. I worry about disappointing a publishing house that has put time and energy and money and marketing into my work. I worry about disappointing myself and my family. Each time I write a manuscript, I wonder if it is good enough.

If I let myself, I could be frozen with doubt, unable to write another word let alone another manuscript.

I have tried to ignore the dreaded Doubt Demon, but it rears its ugly head every time I complete a project. It mocks me, laughing at my attempts to create something compelling and unique.

And I squash it like a bug.

Well, not quite.

What I do is face it. I try to decide what part of my worries and doubt stem from the reality of the manuscript (in other words, is there something that needs to be fixed?) and what parts stem from a natural and very real lack of confidence in my work. If I decide that the project needs improvement, I go back and rework. If I am simply nervous....I package the manuscript and ship it off, knowing that it is now up to others to decide whether or not my story makes the grade.

Publishing is a tough business. When we write, we are allowing our audience a glimpse into our souls. It is not easy to be that vulnerable, that transparent. But to be successful, we must.

So...if you're holding on to that manuscript because you're afraid, know that fear is a part of this journey and face it head-on. Package that manuscript up, kiss it goodbye and let it fly.

Landscape Photos for Cover Art

 

 

 

 

The (Solitary) Writing LIfe

I've decided that writing is lonely work. This may sound odd as I am almost never alone. Five kids and a husband tend to fill a house. The thing is, when I taught, I had curriculum to go by. Books that laid out the daily lessons that had to be imparted to my students. There was always someone in the classroom next door doing the exact same thing I was, and at the end of the day, we'd chat as we planned and graded papers.

Writing is different.

Writing is a about sitting down and crafting a story...alone. Sure, I sometimes brainstorm with my husband or family. Sure, I have friends who are in the same line of work, who are sitting down writing their books, crafting their stories the same way I am writing and crafting mine. Sure, we chat about our projects and moan about our uncooperative characters.

But, when push comes to shove, it is just me and this computer and a ream of paper waiting to be filled. And sometimes I wonder if I can do it again. If I can write another book, craft another tale, create another character. I wonder if I'm on the right path, if this is really where God wants me to be and what He wants me to be doing.

Because no matter how much I know this is the right thing at the right time, sometimes it is lonely being an author. Sometimes, I long to sit down with other mothers and chat over coffee and cookies while our kids play outside and not have stories swimming around in my head while I'm doing it. Not be imagining stalkers and spies and all manner of villains hidden near by and be wondering exactly how I can fit each one into a story. Not be wondering what my heroine will do next, how she will escape, when she will finally realize that love truly does cover a multitude of sins.

It is not that I don't love what I do, but writing is not simply about doing what I love. It has become more than that. It has become part of who I am. As inherent as my blue eyes and brown hair.

But, then, maybe that is what made me an author in the first place. A need to be alone. To enjoy solitude of thought and of creation.

Today, I'm working on my art fact sheet for the second book in my Heroes for Hire Miniseries. I've also got 2000 words of the manuscript to write. It's good work. Fun.

And, sometimes, just a little bit lonely.

In the ends, I suppose that is exactly the way I like it!

The Dreaded Proposal

Two days ago, I discovered that the proposal I'd sent to my editor had never arrived. This was unhappy news as the proposal for that book was due July 27th. I learned of the missing proposal by chance and was relieved when my editor assured me that all was well and that I could send the proposal via email.

Compelled to read through the entire proposal one last time, I stayed up into the wee hours of the morning going through the three pages of manuscript and 18or so pages of synopsis.

I almost wish I hadn't.

I wanted to beg Melissa (my wonderful editor) to NOT read the proposal. Because, really, I'd just come home from China when I wrote it and my mind wasn't working properly, my brain wasn't focused and the entire synopsis STUNK and the pacing of the manuscript was off and, and, and.....

BUT....the proposal is for a contracted book that is due out in July 2010, and Melissa must read it so that we can work out the kinks in the story before I turn in the finished product.

So, I just have to gird my loins and prepare for what will come.

It's not that the story isn't good and it isn't that the writing is bad. I think both are strong. What the proposal is not is my best work. In the six years that I've been writing for Harlequin, I've laid the groundwork for a successful career by turning in good, clean work on time. I offer up my best to the best of my ability every time. Turning in shoddy first draft stuff is not my way, and if you're aspiring to publication it shouldn't be yours either.

To break it down, the key to successfully snagging an editor's attention lies in:

1. Knowing your market. Before ever sending out the proposal make sure you are sending it to the correct house. Do not send a fantasy vampire story to a Love Inspired editor and do not send a clean, sweet romance to Spice. Don't waste a non-fiction editor's time with your fiction proposal.

2. Writing clean. And I don't mean in the subject matter. Whatever you're writing, write it well. Avoid grammatical errors. No one is perfect, and our work can't be either, but if your proposal contains so many mistakes that they become the editor's focus, you've lost your reader and your chance. (this is a big one for me...because, as my blog proves, I've never been great at grammar and spelling)

3. Beginning with a bang. Whether it is compelling emotion or a suspenseful scene that makes the reader want more, a first chapter should always begin with a bang.

4. Creating real characters. My first book wasn't bought on the strength of the writing or the plot. It was bought because Melissa believed in my heroine. She bought into her back story and her conflict, and she was routing for her as the story progressed. A good book must always have characters that your reader can identify with. Real people feeling real emotion.

5. Being professional. This, I suppose, is as much to do with how you present your proposal as it does anything. Print the proposal out on white paper (not pink or blue or yellow or green), follow the guidelines for your targeted publishing house to determine font and margins. Make sure your manuscript is the correct word count to fit those guidelines. Write a cover letter that is brief and to the point. This, too, will be judged by the editor because it is the first glimpse the editor will see of you.

Okay....I've got to scoot. The kids are too quite so there must be trouble brewing!

The Dedication

Cross posted from my adoption blog -

Yesterday, my editor emailed me to ask for the front cover matter for my March 2010 release. I sent the book in a couple of days before I left for China, and I realized then that I'd need to come up with a verse, reader letter and dedication when I got home.

Generally, writing the dedication is the easiest part of preparing my book for publication. In the past, I have dedicated books to friends and family, to my children and my husband, to those whom I've lost and who I miss. The words usually flow from the abundance of the love and appreciation I have for whomever the book is dedicated to.

This time, I'm struggling.

I know who the book will be dedicated to.

Who else could it be but my Cheeky Q?

One day, when she is older, I will give her a copy of the book so that she can read my heart's thoughts and know what I was feeling in the weeks after we brought her home. Perhaps she will be a teenager, fiery in her independence...an older more mature even more beautiful version of the spunky girl I now know. Maybe the words I write today will fill something inside of her that's missing. Maybe, in some small way, they will give her insight into how true and real and big my love for her is.

And so I am struggling.

Just a few words. That's all a dedication is.

But I have so much more to say. I could fill an entire manuscript with words, and my thoughts would still spill out, overflowing into another manuscript and another and another until I was drowning in pages.

And it still would not be enough to say everything that I think I must.

Last night, as the girls were getting ready for bed, I heard Q giggling in the bathroom. The light was off and the door was open, the hall light spilling in. She'd undressed and was waiting for me to turn on the shower.

And she was dancing, the light from the hall painting her pale gold, her arms and legs moving to music only she could hear. She danced without apology, without self consciousness.

While I struggled not to cry.

Because she was so beautiful, so strong, so brave and so completely unaware of how she inspires me to be stronger and braver and less self concious.

I need to write that dedication. My editor wants it by Monday, but there is too much to say and not enough room to say it. Since I cannot say it all, perhaps it is best to keep it simple.

To my darling Q, I am not your first mother or even your second, but I will be your last. It is true that you were not born from my body, but you have always lived in my heart. First a thought, then a prayer and now a reality that fills me up to overflowing. We have not always shared a past, but we will always share a future.
You are mine, my cheeky girl, and I am yours. Forever and a day, to the edges of the universe and beyond. I love you.

Here's the Thing About Being Writer

No matter what is happening in your life, words must be written, deadlines must be met, projects must be completed, edited, rewritten.

After spending two weeks in China, I arrived home knowing that I had several tasks before me. The first was to incorporate my new daughter into family life. My second was to keep my other four children from feeling displaced. My third was to write.

It isn't easy to be creative when your thoughts are caught up in the reality of life. The mini traumas and the major ones, the doctor appointments, fevers, medicines. The laundry and dishes and cooking.

It isn't easy to be creative, but if you're truly going to be an author, you must be.

Sometimes that means allowing yourself to daydream, to imagine the scenes that you'll put into your book. Sometimes it means sitting down and forcing yourself to put words to page. Any words. All words. Whatever is in your mind and heart.

I have found myself doing both things in the past ten days. I've got a proposal for my second book in the HEROES FOR HIRE series due in a couple of weeks, and no matter how jet lagged or sick (we've been stricken by the flu) I am, the writing will get done. That's how I've made a name for myself with my editors, and it is how I continue to sell to Harlequin. Good books turned in on time. It is my MO, and I refuse to slip into anything else.

I suppose there is a life lesson in here somewhere. Something about learning how much we really can accomplish when we're motivated enough. Maybe something even more profound about God giving us the time we need when we spend our time pursuing His will.

Unfortunately, I'm too tired to wax poetic about my writing journey. Instead, I will simply say that being an author means reaching beyond what you think you can do and discovering that you are much, much more capable than you ever imagined.

Blessings on your writing journey!

PS..the photo is of my beautiful treasures. I'm one blessed writer mom!

The Aftermath

Just so you know I'm not superwoman -

Yep, that's the pile of laundry that didn't get done while I was finishing the manuscript. It has to get done now, because my sister comes tomorrow to take care of the kids while hubby and I are in China.

It's a lot of laundry, but, then, I've got a lot of kids!

The Week In Review

The photos say it all. Book 15 or 14 or whatever it is, completed, edited, polished, packaged. Every time I finish a book, I feel like a tree killer. Piles of paper in the garbage can. Piles of paper on my desk.

Piles and piles and piles.

310 pages of manuscript printed out and read. Edited and reread. Re-printed and read again.

Aside from making sure my book was ready to go, I began packing, completed paperwork that must be hand carried to China, shopped for the stuff Sassy E needs for her performance. Typed up lists for my sisters and mom (who will be staying here).

And realized I am adopting a child.

Really and truly and for sure.

Bringing her home and making her part of us at the same time we allow ourselves to become part of her world, her life, her experiences. All her goods and bads and in betweens, all her challenges and triumps, swirling into what we already have.Our challenges and triumphs, our goods and bads and in betweens. Until there is no longer an us, no longer any her, but simply a family.

There is something beautiful and profound in that. Something beyond words or even thought. Something that wells up and spills out, overflowing into everything I do and think and say.

I finished my book this week, but more than that happened. I realized I was adopting a child. Really and truly and forever.

And it changed me.

Four days.

One down. One to go.

With my trip to China looming, it's important that I stay on top of my writing schedule. This is much easier said than done. I'm trying, but my big fear is that I'll fall behind. My next book is due June 15th. I leave for China June 17th.

Yikes!

Thankfully, book 14 was just accepted, and my editor did not need me to revise it. That is a HUGE relief off my mind. I was trying to figure out how I'd finish book fifteen and revise book fourteen and get ready to leave for China. No matter how many ways I tried to make it happen in my mind, it never did.

So, I've been saved the fate of having too much to do. Instead, I have enough to do.

Which may actually be the same as too much.

Oh well. Better to be busy than bored. And I definitely am busy!

Ready or not, here we come!

I know. This is my writing blog. However, my mind is caught up in all things related to Q, so.....

We've finally got approval to travel to meet her!

We leave June 17th and will be back July 1 or 2.

We should meet Q on June 22.

I've got to get RUNNING FOR COVER in to my editor before then.

Here We Go Again!

I'm off and running on my next book. RUNNING FOR COVER is the first book in a three book miniseries about a sibling group separated by adoption.

I guess adoption has been on my mind a lot lately.

So, for Mother's Day, my wonderful husband bought me the perfect gift - a new laptop!

As you may recall, my old laptop died a quick, brutal death. Now it is nothing more than a carcass waiting to be buried or brought back to life. I'm not sure which will happen.

As I admired my new writing tool, I was reminded of the days when my sons were much younger and believed that new sneakers would make them run faster. Each boy did the same. He'd put on his new shoes and run through the yard, shouting, "Look! Look how fast I am now, Mom!" And, in those sweet moments, it seemed as if they really were.

Today I will type on my new computer, and I will hope that the same shoe fairy who sprinkled magic speed-up dust on my sons' shoes has also sprinkled magic speed-up dust on the keyboard of my laptop, so that I can type faster than ever and shout for my boys to come see. "Look! Look how fast I am now, kids!"

Happy Mother's Day!

Gotta Love This Cover

My May release is the last in the Sinclair brothers series and the first book I've had with hero and heroine on the cover. I'm not sure if people on covers is a new trend for Love Inspired Suspense or if it's new trend for my books or if it isn't a trend at all, but my last two Sinclair brothers stories have had people on them. I've always preferred to have scenes on my book covers, but I may be changing my mind. The cover for DEFENDER'S DUTY does make me ask questions, and the book covers that make me ask questions are usually on the books I end up buying.

Today, I begin work on the first book in my new miniseries. My goal is to mail the book out by June 8. I hope to fly to China sometime after that, so I really need the book complete and in Melissa's hands by then. In order to do this, I've got to increase my word count by 500 - 1000 words a day. We'll see how that goes!

I've got nothing insightful or interesting to say, so I'm off to begin my word count for the day.

The End

Those are some of my favorite words. They mean - done, complete, finished. They mean a goal met, a contract fulfilled, a success rather then a failure. They mean I have followed through, persevered and kept going. They mean that when times were tough, when kids were cranky, when I was cranky, I gritted my teeth, bore it and just kept right on going.

They mean that I am not just a dreamer, I am an author.

They mean that hour after hour of typing letters, words and sentences have not been in vain.

They mean the vision in my head is now something I can hold in my hands.

And they mean a new beginning, a fresh start, another chance to make it just right.

Which is what I have today!

The manuscript is complete. The author is happy. And maybe that pile of laundry will finally get clean!

Worst Fears Confirmed (double posted from my adoption blog)

Or so it seems.

My gut instinct on the swine flu thing was right on. According to the Rumor Queen, some agencies are reporting that no referrals are being issued this month and that CCAA (china center of adoption affairs)will be shut down for 20 - 30 days. I'm not buying the shut down, and I really don't think referrals will be held up. I don't think this will effect LOA by more than a day or two. What I do believe is that no travel approvals will be issued until after the swine flu outbreak has weakened its hold.

Of course, this happened just days after I cancelled a book signing at the biggest book expo in north America. Not only do I not get to see my daughter in May, I've had to disappoint my publishing house for nothing.

Please excuse me while I go drown my sorrows in chocolate.

Profound Writer Thoughts

Ha!

Yesterday was take your kids to work day at my husband's job. I would have had several hours to write in complete SILENCE, but my eldest son had piano guild and I had to drive him there, wait for him to complete 45 minutes of evaluation and then drive him back to my husband's workplace. Although I was supposed to pick the kids up sometime after lunch, I figured I'd rush home and write for an hour and a half while the house was empty (and what a blessed thing that is!).

So, off I went. Back to the house and the computer.

That's where things got dicey.

My intentions were good, but I started having an internal dialogue that went something like this -

"Shirlee, you need to sit down at the computer and write."

"I would, but I'm hungry. I need to eat."

"You need to write."

"But I can't write when I'm hungry. I might actually lose weight and what a catastrophe that would be." Cue violin music here.

"You NEED TO WRITE."

"Okay, I need to write. But do I want to write? I mean really want to?"

"Yes. You want to write because you need to write, because you get paid to write, because you actually enjoy writing. So WRITE."

At which point I sat myself down in front of the computer, pulled up my manuscript and would like to say I began writing.

But that would be a lie and lies are not allowed in Love Inspired (not to mention the fact that God strictly prohibits them).

So, I decided I needed to check on a few blogs I follow, but the entire time I perused the blogs, that annoying voice in my head was chanting, WRITE, WRITE, WRITE, WRITE.

And the other voice (because, of course, there are two) was whining, I JUST WANT TO RELAX FOR A FEW MINUTES.

And finally the chanting, annoying voice won out. I started writing. The words started flowing. I forgot I was hungry and that I'd rather read a few blogs and relax. I forgot writing was work that I wasn't sure I felt like doing. The ideas burst onto the page in words and phrases for ten whole minutes.

And then the phone rang. It was my husband, telling me it was time to pick the kids up. I saved my manuscript, walked out my front door, and a little voice whispered in head, "see, I TOLD you you should have started writing as soon as you got home!"

So, in case you're ever wondering what goes through my head before I begin writing...refer to this post. It explains everything! And in case you ever start having a similar internal dialogue with yourself...go with the voice that's screaming WRITE. It'll save you time, because for authors, that voice always wins in the end.

Thank Goodness For My Husband

The adoption is really wreaking havoc on my brain. For well over two weeks, I've been saving my continuity book on a USB device (I'm sure it is called something else, but I'm not computer savvy enough to know the name). At least that is what I thought I was doing. Until my wonderful laptop CRASHED. As in...completely stopped working. As in....no way to access my file. So, feeling rather smug that I'd done exactly what my-husband-the-computer-guy is always telling me to do and saved my document on a backup disk, I pulled out the USB device, plugged it into my desktop and realized that I HAD NOT BEEN SAVING the document to the device. Suddenly, I was three and a half weeks from deadline and missing the last ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY PAGES of my document.

I did not cry. Although, there were some tears in my eyes. Instead, I swallowed down panic and began rewriting those 120 pages while my husband (the most wonderful real-life hero in the world) went to work on my dead laptop and confirmed that it was, indeed, dead.

I rewrote thirty pages of document that night, the sick feeling in my stomach never quite leaving. I write fast, but not so fast that I could finish in time to meet my deadline. I'm a stickler for getting my stuff in on time, so this was a very big deal. I knew I'd have to call my editor and tell her that I might need an extra couple of weeks. Meanwhile, my husband wrestled the hard drive from my laptop, brought it to work and was able to extract all but ten pages of my work!

Yay, hubby! Yay, me! Yay, Emily who will now not get a panicked, tearful call from a panicked and tearful author who stupidly was not saving to the right file on her computer.

Crisis averted. Lesson learned. Now every time I save, I save to both my USB and my hard drive.

In honor of his hero status, I am posting a photo of my hero hubby signing the adoption papers for Q. And, of course, I couldn't resist also posting pictures of my cheeky (thanks for the word, Brenda) new daughter.

Introducing Q!!!

Today, we received the surprise of our lives. Approval from China to adopt our fifth child. Q was born March 31, 2002. She is seven years old and waiting in Chongqing. I do not believe in labeling my kids or in limiting them, so I've kept from mentioning Q's special need (which, I think, is obvious). However, I am happy to answers any questions about it.

We are beside ourselves with joy. As always, God's timing proves beyond what any of us anticipated. We were expecting to wait at least another 1.5 month for China to say 'yes' to our request to adopt Q. Instead of the average of fifty-odd days, it took only 32 for our approval.

Please pray for us as we begin making travel plans. Pray for Q. She is old enough to understand what is about to happen, and I can't help wondering if she's scared. Imagine being told that strangers were coming from a strange place to take you from everything you have ever known. Imagine that those strangers spoke a language you didn't understand. That is what is happening to Q.

Every time I think about it, I want to cry.

Where Art Thou, Spring?

With your green shoots and vivid colors?
Your chirping birds and azure sky?
Where art thou, spring?
Did the thrill of winter offend?
The joy of icy storms and snow covered cow patties drive you away?
Where art thou, spring?
Not here in Washington.
That is for sure.

Hahahahahahah.

That is maniacal laughter. I've been driven to it by this:

"SPOKANE, Wash.- With at least another inch of new snow in Spokane County the record snowfall record for a season has officially been shattered. Spokane County broke the record on Sunday by about a tenth of an inch. The old record was set in 1949-1950 at 93.5 inches. On Sunday, Spokane County hit 93.6 inches.

So far there haven't been any snowfall totals for Thursday morning. The National Weather Service is reporting at least an inch of fresh snow on the ground and calling for another 3 to 5 inches by day's end." KHQ-TV

Writing Advice

Lately, I've been receiving a lot of email asking for advice on becoming a writer. This has made me think a lot about the tools needed to actually sit down and write a book and, beyond writing the book, what it takes to make the story engaging to a reader.

Last night, I read an email from a thirteen-year-old who asked for tips on how to become an author. I was able to pull from several weeks of thoughts on the subject and pinpoint three key characteristics of a good writer. Those three are listed below along with the advice I provided for the thirteen-year-old. No rocket science here, just commonsense. Sometimes, though, we're so busy looking for the 'secret' to success we forget that there's no secret to it at all.

A writer must be a voracious reader.
One of the most important things you can do to prepare to be a writer is to read a lot. Fiction. Non-fiction. Whatever you can get your hands on! Learn how to write interesting sentences and how to create a compelling scene by studying the work of authors that you like. Then practice using words to paint vivid pictures for your readers. An author who can do this will always have a readership.

An author is a a student of humanity.
Aside from reading and practicing the art of writing, you should also spend time studying people. In order to be a good writer, you must understand how people think and act. You must know what they are doing but also why they are doing it. Studying people will help you create compelling characters that will grab a reader's attention.

An author has an indomitable spirit.
Being a writer means never giving up. Sometimes writers are rejected many times before they are published. Teach yourself to persists even in the face of what seems like failure. After all, God often teaches us the most important lessons when we are at the point where we are ready to give up. Remember that success will happen in God's time, but that His timing does not preclude our hard work. In other words, you must work hard to learn the craft of writing so that you will be ready for whatever writing opportunity God sends your way.

Two Down, Two to Go

And I'm not talking about books.

I'm afraid the ICK has hit my house. Darling Daughter One was sick last week, went on an antibotic and started feeling better. So, of course, twenty-four hours later, Darling Son Three told me his throat hurt. I spent a couple hours at the doctor and pharmacy yesterday and, besides his horrible cough, Number Three is feeling better. Fever is down, throat isn't hurting as much, nose isn't running.

But I'm sure his germs are. Probably running straight to Darling Son One or Two. Now, I don't want to play favorites, but if the ICK is going to hit, I hope it hits Son Two. Son One can't handle being sick.

In case you're wondering, I'm still writing. The thing about working from home is that there are very few good excuses for not going in to the office! That is both a blessing and a curse. I have noticed, though, that I am able to come up with plenty of excuses to avoid doing laundry. Kids are sick? Can't get the laundry done. Migraine? Can't get the laundry done? Smashed big toe into wall? Can't get the laundry done.

Sadly, I seem to be out of excuses today. Or maybe it's simply that the pile of laundry is multiplying three times for every one excuse I make. Sigh.

Here's hoping your laundry piles are a lot less tall than mine!

After the Call

A few people have asked if I'm as excited about a new sale as I was with my very first. The answer is - I am!

However, that excitement is tempered by knowledge. I understand the process now. I know what happens after the call. So, rather than screaming at the top of my lungs, jumping up and down and shivering with anxiety and anticipation, I scream at the top of my lungs, jump up and down and then get to work. I pick dates for turning in my proposals and my completed work. I email those to my editor and I mark my calender with circles and smiley faces and huge exclamation points. I assess my schedule, looking carefully at what will come in the next year and planning my writing schedule accordingly. I brainstorm titles, book cover ideas, and I think of how I will cut my twenty-five page synopsis down to one (for the art department). I assess how many words will need to be written each day to attain a goal of manuscript completion three weeks prior to my due date (after so many years and so many books, I know that is exactly how long it will take to revise and polish my manuscripts).

Then, I take two days off. I bask in the joy of being published. I celebrate, but only for a couple of days. Because I know that receiving that contract is only a small part of a very long, very wonderful road.

Happy Sunday!

Yay!

I've got to run and get finger printed (again). It should be exciting. Several hours of waiting in a crowded lobby to get my fingerprints taken. Fingerprints which are already in the data banks. And I can assure everyone who wants those prints...I haven't sewn on new fingers since the last two sets of prints were taken.

The good news is...Melissa Endlich offered me a three book contract!

I'm so excited to begin this newest series. The excitement over that will last way longer than the inconvenience of fingerprinting.

Have I said lately how much I LOVE my editor??

Immortalized in a Venerable Monument

I have four...well, actually five....kids.

Of the four that are at home, only one has inherited my love of the written word. The other three....well, let's just say they'd rather not write anything. And read? We're making headway in that area, but I still wouldn't say they adore books the way I do.

So it was with great dread that I collected today's writing assignments. Each kid was required to choose a place and write a paragraph describing it. The key to this assignment was to use interesting adjectives. Three of my kids didn't do so well. Unless you include big, little, loud, green, bright or beautiful in your list of interesting adjectives. My twelve-year-old, however, put a smile on my face. He chose to describe Mount Rushmore, and his description could have come out of any travel brochure. As a matter of fact, I tactfully (ha!) asked if he'd looked in his history book. He, being him, reminded me that he was studying world history not US history.

My favorite sentence of his was - The four presidents immortalized in this venerable monument....

My writer's heart swelled fifteen times its normal size when I read that. Immortalized. Venerable.

Those are interesting words, thoughtfully used. They reflect the kind of passion for written language that can't be taught or learned.

It's a God-given gift and I can't take any credit for it, but I can't help but be happy that one of my kids shares my passion for words

I HATE Waiting

Waiting.

It's part of a writer's life.

That doesn't mean I like doing it.

Currently, I am waiting on several things. Not all of them writing related.

I am waiting to hear whether or not my wonderful editor Melissa Endlich can convince my senior editor to buy my next book. Melissa said she loved it, but maybe the senior editor of the line will hate it. Seeing as how I've been suffering severe writer's doubts lately, that seems like a likely scenario. Though Melissa has assured me that I have no reason to doubt my writing, the perfectionist part of me just can't let go of the "I'm not good enough" feeling. Strange since I've written twelve books already. Sigh.

I am waiting on pre-approval from China. I won't even go into that. Suffice to say....waiting is NOT fun.

I am waiting for spring. Seeing as how it is 14 degrees outside, there is a blanket of snow on the ground, the weatherman is calling for single digit temps and there is snow in the forecast for the weekend, I think I may be waiting for a long, long time.

Maybe I should bake some bread. At least waiting for the dough to rise has its benefits. That pungent yeasty scent that wafts from under the cloth. The slow rise that is obvious and noticeable and makes the wait much less painful. And then the certainty of success. I've baked enough loaves of bread to know when it's going to work and when it's not, and I only bother waiting for the ones that will. The best thing is that its in my control. I start the dough knowing how long it will take. I begin with the knowledge that the end of the process will occur in a rather defined amount of time.

If only the wait on everything else in my life could be so easily predicted!

Will You Show Up?

We had a guest speaker at church a couple of weeks ago. He isn't a pastor, but does short mission trips. His message really touched me, and I often find myself thinking about his words. He was talking about the boy with the loaves and fish and the wonderful miracle Jesus performed. It's a story I've heard and read a thousand times. However, what the speaker said, really resonated with me. He asked.....

Will you show up?

Will you give what you have?

Will you believe that what you have is enough for God to accomplish His plan?

Sometimes I look at my abilities, my time, my talents and my finances and I wonder, "what can God do with these? They're nothing compared with what others have."

But God isn't asking me to give more than what I have. He isn't asking that I wait until I feel accomplished enough, talented enough, wealthy enough. He is asking me to be where He needs me now, with what I have now. He is asking me to have faith in His ability to accomplish great things through me despite my shortcomings, my lack of time, of talent, of wealth.

In these trying times, we can still believe that God can use us. That He will use us. If only we are willing to show up and to give what little we have.

Where Did Spring Go?

For a few blessed days it was above 45 degrees here in beautiful Washington. I basked in the sweet smell of spring that seemed to hover in the air. Rain fell, but it was a soft rain. The kind that brings thoughts of gardens and flowers and green leaves.

And then winter returned.

I wonder if the robins that have been hopping around in the yard are as shell shocked as I am.

At least the quail are happy. They've been running around the yard. One in particular always makes me smile. He seems happy to be with his buddies, but happier still to find food. Often, the covey of quail will be in the neighbor's yard. Then, as if all are wondering about the grass being greener on the other side, they'll run in mass toward the fence, quickly ducking under it. All except for my favorite little guy. He runs just a little slower, arrives at the fence just a little after everyone else. Then he tries to squeeze underneath. Oh, how he tries. Pushing his cute little head under, realizing that he can't proceed, backing up and trying again. Only to finally understand that he simply cannot squeeze beneath. Suddenly, he'll hop from the ground, spread his wings, soar for just a moment before he lands on the other side.

I've seen the quail do this a half a dozen times since we moved to Spokane. Sometimes I think the poor bird is a little dense. I mean, he's tried six times and hasn't made it under yet. Other times, I think he's foolish. What if a cat were coming? Would he still try to go under the fence or would he immediately spread his wings and fly. Most of the time, though, I admire his pluck. Failing once hasn't kept him from trying again. To him, getting under the fence has never ceased to be a possibility. Trying and failing only gives him more impetus to try again.

And who knows? Maybe one day he'll make it under that fence. I can almost see him now, strutting his stuff through our winter-barren garden, his feathers fluffed and his head high.

If only I could so clearly see my own failures as opportunities to persist. If only I could believe as strongly as that pint sized bird that anything is possible. Animals are not capable of faith, but they are capable of persistence. Why is it that we humans, who have faith opened up to us, are so quick to see failure as the end of the road rather than the beginning of another chance?

New York or Bust

It's been a while since I've gone on any writer conferences. Between the adoption and our move, I've had little time to think or plan a trip away from the hubby and kids. When my editor asked if I'd like to attend BEA this year, I jumped at the opportunity. BEA is a huge book expo. Lots of people. Lots of books. Lots of fun. Basically, I'll sign books for an hour and then wander around visiting other booths and collecting tons of freebies. Gotta love the freebies. This will be my third BEA. My second in New York. The expo is at the end of May, and I'm planning to fly into Baltimore and take the train up to New York. My Mom and oldest sister both want to come with me, so we can have some great family time as we ride up on the train. I'll get guest passes for both of them and they can visit all the booths while I sign.

Seeing as how kid #5 will arrive sometime this summer (we hope), BEA will probably be my last conference until next summer. I'd planned to attend RWA, but at this point have put plans for that on hold. Being an author is a great and wonderful gift, and I love it. But (big but)family comes first. Once Q comes home, she and the other kids and hubby will need me on the home front. I'm a little sad at having to say no to a trip I've been planning for a year. RWA in D.C. was going to be awesome! Harlequin is celebrating its 60th birthday, and I so wanted to be part of the party.

This is the hard thing about being a working mom. Finding balance between pursuing a career and being around for the family.

Of course, in this situation, it's a no brainer.

I rest in the assurance that God chose the path I'm on. He placed my feet on it, He patted me on the back and whispered encouragingly, "Go!" and He's walking beside me all the way. There may not always be balance in my life, but there is always faith. And where there is faith, there is hope and there is peace.

Waiting, Waiting, Waiting...

Well, it seems like I'm waiting for everything lately. Waiting for preapproval from China is torture. Add to that a wait to hear back on my newest proposal and things get even worse.

I can't complain about the wait on the proposal, though. After months of suffering writer doubts and putting off mailing in the completed proposal, I finally managed to get up my courage and mail it. LAST WEEK. Sigh.

This morning, I heard from my wonderful editor Melissa Endlich. I'm happy to say she already read the proposal. I'm even happier to say she loved it. She asked for a brief description of the second and third story in the series I was proposing. Fortunately my procrastinating to mail in the proposal gave me plenty of time to think about story ideas. I was able to do a one page write-up for each book and email it to her within a couple of hours of her query.

So now I'm waiting again.

I suppose Melissa will send the proposal up to Tina who will make the final decision about buying (or not)the three book series.

I love writing. I love being an author.

I do not love waiting.

Okay....so it's been a (long) while

I admit it. I got caught up in six million things since our move. I thought I'd easily slip back into my schedule, but moving across the country takes a little more than a week to recover from. Here I am, six months in, and still trying to figure life in Washington out.

And I mean that in the best possible way.

Do I love it here?

Yep.

Would I do it again?

Of course.

But a move is a life change and life changes need time to be recovered from. I love our new house, our new neighbors, the rural feel and the closeness of town. I love the view of the mountains that I see every time I glance out the kitchen window. I love our land and our little red barn (which will soon be home to several chickens). I love our new church and our new friends, but I miss our old church and our old friends. I miss my family. My nieces and my plethora of nephews. I miss going out to the store and seeing a dozen people that I know.

What I've realized about this move is that life is often about taking chances. We can choose to sit and let life happen to us or we can choose to take action and happen to life. Rodney, the kids and I....well, we happened to life when we arrived in Spokane. Our loud, exuberant family took the quiet street we live on by storm. We barged into churches and dance studios and art centers. We banged out piano songs and sang loudly. We laughed. We happened.

That's not to say it was easy. God has planned this for us for a long time. I've no doubt about that. Selling our Maryland house to the first people to walk through the door, finding our new home that met our needs so beautifully (and was built by a man who was building for no one but himself...proving that in 1978 God was planning for us to live here)...everything fell into place. But change is scary, isn't it? The unknown, the unseen, the invisible roads that will lead from this place and to others....it is hard to walk toward those things no matter how much faith we have that God is in them.

Which brings me to some news that I share with the greatest fear and the fullest of hope. Soon my family will 'happen' to China. In three months or four or five or six we will travel to meet the newest member of the McCoy family. At this point we are still waiting for a pre approval letter from China, but we have submitted a letter of intent to adopt. In other words, we have accepted a referral for a little girl. She will be seven in March. She needs us as much as we need her. Like our other children, she is talkative and outgoing, loves music and activity. My mother, on viewing the photo, said, "She looks like another live wire. Well, what's one more?"

So true, Mom, so true.

Once we receive pre-approval I will be able to post more information, but for now, I leave you with this thought: Doing nothing is safe. Doing nothing is easy. Make it your goal to not do nothing.

Not do nothing.

I've heard that six million times on the Christian radio station lately. Such an easy concept, but so difficult.

Whatever your dreams, whatever God's desire for you....go forward boldly and do NOT do nothing.

Shirlee

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas

Good from Bad

At a time of the year when we all want to be carried away with joy and peace, many people are struggling. Life isn't always easy. My sister Sara can attest to that. Her husband has been sick for eighteen months. Not just a little sick. The kind of sick that changes a person. And everyone who loves him.

Here is an article written by Sara for Today's Christian Woman. Perhaps you'll find her journey encouraging.

http://www.christianitytoday.com/tcw/2008/sepoct/9.88.html

It's supposed to be raining, but....

Instead, it's snowing.

Hope you all had a great Thanksgiving!

Continuity 2010

On the heels of posting the cover for COLD CASE MURDER, I've been asked to write book four in the 2010 continuity. All the stories will deal with witness protection. So far, I know that my heroine is pregnant and in witness protection. I also know that her ex-husband is trying to find her and that just as he finds her so does the villian.

Sound intriguing?

It did to me. Plus, I really love writing stories about couples who reunite.

I can't wait to get started!

Another Cover

This is for the 2009 LI Suspense continuity. It makes me wonder. I guess that is always a good thing when it comes to covers. If I wonder about the cover, I'll pick up the book and read the blurb.

There is Snow on the Mountains

And it is COLD.

Okay, so it's not quite as cold as I'm told it's going to get. Currently, it's no colder than it was in Maryland in December. I'm not much for cold weather. However, I've decided I will learn to love it. I'm here in cold country, so I may as well get used to the idea.

Also, the snowy mountains are beautiful. Makes me want to write a historical just so that I can write about traveling through those mountains during the winter. Although, I don't suppose many settlers would have chanced it. I can't even imagine driving through some of those passes on a road in a car.

Christmas will be different this year. No family around. Not a huge network of friends. We'll be creating new traditions and new memories, but that doesn't mean we won't miss old traditions. And while I'm thinking of new traditions and family, I can't help wondering what DD #2 is doing. I know, it's been a while since I've mentioned the adoption, but that doesn't mean it's not still happening. Our daughter will have another year in China without us. We'll have another year here without her. I don't stress much about time passing. All of it is in God's hands.

Now...I'd better go write. I hope you all are writing too!

Probation and Weed

Oddly enough, I found a cell phone while walking through the woods near my son's art class. I planned to charge the phone, look for a home number and call the owner of the phone. Of course, being me, I immediately thought, "I wonder if this beat up phone belongs to a drug dealer." Then dismissed the thought as pure imagination.

My son, being much more technically savvy than I am, managed to figure out that the phone was still charged. He turned it on, and I scrolled through the contact list, hoping to find a home number. Guess what I found? An entry titled "Probation" and one titled "Weed".

As I was contemplating my next move, the phone rang and some loud music spewed from it. Immediately, I had visions of tracking devices and gang members, drug feuds and me and my kids caught in the middle.

I decided then and there that the owner of the phone could do without a call from me. I thought about mailing the phone to the police, but decided I'd feel too much like an idiot. I mean, maybe "weed" was someones last name. And maybe probation was....well, something other than what I thought.

Regardless, the phone was turned off and deposited in a lost and found.

Somehow I doubt it will ever be retrieved.

Dancing is Like a Party to Music

So said my seven-year-old daughter to a new girl in her jazz class. Knowing my daughter and her love of words, music and dance, this didn't surprise me. However, the mother of the girl E was talking to was struck by it enough that she told her sister-in-law who came to me and asked if I'd heard my daughter's words.

I relayed the conversation and E's words to my youngest sister who said, "Wow. That's passion."

And that got me thinking.

What is it that makes a dancer work so hard for so long for so little encouragement? What drives an artist or musician to face criticism and critique, rejection and failure? How does a gymnast or a football player face physical pain, fear and heartache over and over again without quitting? What is it that compells a writer to write when her words may never be read, her story never told?

Is it only passion? To me passion is something that waxes and wanes. It may be there one day and not the next. What lives inside the person who is successful despite astounding odds is something different. Drive, determination and, most importantly, resiliancy. The person who continues to pursue his or her passion is the one who can take a punch, shrug it off and keep going. She is the person who works not just for the accolades and trophies, but for the sheer joy of self expression. She is the person who listens and learns, who is not afraid to fail because she understands that only in failing can she succeed.

That is passion. That is heart. That is courage. That is success.

Migraine...uhg

Migraines stink.

I just wanted to get that out. After suffering through one for the past twelve hours, I'm completely disgusted by the fact that my head refuses to listen to my mind which is telling it to stop hurting!

To make myself happier, I've been contemplating things I love. I'm posting one of those things here.

Usually, I don't post photos of kids, but I figure they're all in a group, I've posted no names and no one knows where any of them live....so....here's to my nieces and nephews (of which I have many). These are the nephews and nieces from my side of the family. Two are missing. My sister's kids (the ones playing games after hurricane Ike). My husband's side of the family is smaller, and I won't post pictures of them.

Where are All the Christian Fiction Writers?

This is the question that has been foremost in my mind for the past few weeks. I decided that when I moved to Spokane I would connect to people by finding writing groups. I've found the local chapter of the RWA (yay!), but still haven't found a Christian fiction writers group.

What's that about?

Surely I'm not the only Christian fiction writer in Spokane.

The one group I did find meets during the day. Not a good time for a homeschool mom.

On-line groups are great, but there's something much more intimate and fun about meeting people face to face. The exchange of ideas, of creative energy helps me renew as a writer.

On a completely different note...my dog is in love with the cow next door. Or maybe the cow is in love with my dog. Today, I was out walking in the yard and the cow was watching intently as Rushmore raced after me. Seconds later, the cow let out a very deep bellow. To me, it sounded like unrequited love. Then again, I'm not so great at cow-speak. If I wrote LI, I'd think that would be a perfect way for heroine and hero to meet - over a lovesick cow and puppy.

What does the picture of a heart-shaped rock have to do with any of this? My son found the rock in our field. Without showing it to me, he went inside and wrote "I love you" on it. Then he brought it out and handed it to me. Which has nothing to do with anything except how very sweet my ten-year-old is!

Help!

I'm drowning in fruit. We've got an apple tree and a pear tree in our back yard that have been producing loads of fruit since we arrived. We've also got grapes which will be ripe any day now. Then there's our gruff neighbor Fred. He brought over several pounds of plums the other day. And by several I mean a LOT.

Considering how expensive groceries are and how many kids I've got to feed, I can't complain about the plethora of fruit. The problem is, I don't know what to do with it. Can it? Bake it into bread or cake? Freeze it? What does one do with ripe fruit other than snack on it?

I've looked up recipes and have so far made pear/plum jam, several loaves of pear bread, an apple pie, a pear pie, zucchini bread (zucchini compliments of our neighbor Leonora). At this point, I'm sick of peeling fruit and I'm tired of baking. Which is saying a lot seeing as how I love to bake.

So, if anybody knows a way to freeze fruit without it getting gross and brown and mushy, I'd love to hear it.

After the Storm

My sister already has electricty. She's fortunate. I know a lot of people in Houston are still without power. She sent me some pictures of the damage to the neighborhood and the cute picture above of her two sons playing in the dark (dad is holding a flashlight on the game). It makes me thankful to have lights and working bathrooms and so many other things that I take for granted.

We're really blessed in this country.

Hurricane yIKEs

Above is a picture of my sister's boarded up window as well as the sky above her Houston home yesterday evening before the hurricane hit. Last night, she, her husband and two kids rode out the storm. Since the eye of the hurricane never went over their town, they had hours of high wind with no reprieve. Sara said the house was literally shaking beneath the force of it. We're so thankful the house is still standing, but more thankful that Sara and her family are okay.

Let's all remember to pray for those that weren't so fortunate. There's a lot of devastation in Houston and the surrounding area and many people will need support in the weeks to come.

New Inspiration

When I wrote my first published book, I had been inspired by Smith Mountain Lake. My mother-in-law had just had a house built, and the beauty and serenity of the place touched something deep in my soul. Every time I visit Kitty, I am reminded of Romans 1:20 - For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse.

There is so much beauty in this world it is seemingly impossible to believe that it happened by chance. Creation cries out, demanding our attention, commanding us to acknowledge the truth.

Here in Spokane, I look at distant mountains and deep blue sky, I hear the whisper of wind through fields of long grass and I want to drink it all in, write it all down. I am not an artist who paints or draws. I am a word artist. My books are my canvas. My words my medium.

And this new place I've come to is ripe with inspiration.

What inspires you?

New Covers

Well, after several years of covers with no people, I've got two covers with people on them. I guess the hunky Sinclair brothers really did deserve to be put on the covers of their books. The above hunky hero is Grayson Sinclair. I've never been much for covers that have people on them. I think, though, that if I saw this in the store I'd pick it up. Good looking guy. Nice colors. What more can an author or reader ask? Besides a good story that is!

Long Trip

Well, we arrived in Spokane Valley last Friday after a long but wonderful trip across country. As we'd planned, we stopped at Mount Rushmore and Yellowstone National park. We also took a side trip to a place called 1880s Town. The kids had a blast seeing so much of our wonderful country. So did Rodney and I...until the last day. Those final three hundred miles seemed to take an eternity!

Home is a nice split foyer in a beautiful setting. There are mountain views from the back deck, a cow in the pasture next door, friendly neighbors. We got a dog that we named Rushmore. He and the kids love to roam the pasture behind our house. Rushmore is a goldendoodle and is the only dog my eldest son has absolutely no allergies to. As if he senses that Jude has had to stay far away from dogs, Rushmore has taken quite a shine to my thirteen-year-old. If all four kids are out playing, Jude is the one Rushmore wants to hang out with.

It took almost a week to get Comcast in to hook up our internet. Happily, that happened yesterday. So....I'm back! Yay!

After we arrived in Spokane, I realized just how tired I've been. Between the adoption, writing deadlines, homeschooling the kids, the car accident and the move, I was drained. Our trip across country has renewed me. For a week, I did no writing at all. I'm happy to say that I missed it. There's something cathartic about writing. It frees the mind and eases the burdens of the soul. I think that is God's gift to those of us who write...that in using what He's given us, we gain a sense of peace.

Where in the World is Shirlee McCoy?

It's been a while. So long, in fact, that I forgot my password for this blog and had to create a new one. Yikes!

I do have an excuse. Actually, I have several. The biggest is that I'm moving. I'm not talking a little move. I'm talking a 2400 mile across country move. It's happening in two days, and I still can't believe it's real. One minute, my husband was saying, "my company has a position in Spokane, Washington...." and the next we were selling our house and getting ready to move.

Speaking of selling houses, with the housing market what it is in our area, we were sure it would take three months or more to sell. Instead, the first person that walked into our house bought it. I'd like to think that is because of my impeccable decorating sense, but seeing as how I don't decorate at all, I have to admit God was moving in a big way.

That was miracle number one in the McCoy moving odyssey. The second miracle was that our China dossier for the adoption was logged into China right around the time the words Spokane and Washington started being tossed around in our house. So, while we will have several adoption things to do once we arrive in our new home, we are officially paper pregnant! Yes, friends, I'm two months along!

The third miracle....my writing projects are caught up and done. The timing worked out perfectly so that I could make the long drive (yes, we're driving) without having the pressure of books or proposals on my mind. I turned in the last book in the Sinclair series, completed line edits on my continuity and am currently working on a proposal for a new project. No stress. No fuss. I can leave Maryland and start fresh in Spokane. Yay!

God's timing is always perfect. My husband and I have wanted to move from our very hectic and crowded home to a place a little less hectic and a little less crowded for the entire fourteen years of our marriage. We've looked in different areas, made attempts to buy land or purchase houses. In the end, doors were closed, and we refused to force them back open. With this move, the door flew open before we even knocked and it has remained open, beckoning us to whatever God has planned for us.

This past Sunday was our last time with our wonderful church family. Our pastor pulled me aside and said, "Shirlee, I want to tell you that I think this move is going to be the best thing for your family. I've seen you and Rodney trying to move many times over the years, but it was never right. This time, God has opened the doors. Your house sale, finding a new home so quickly, God is working everything out for you this time. And I really believe this is God's will for your lives."

My point? Waiting on God is never easy. We want to hear 'yes', not 'no' or 'not now'. But in waiting, we allow God to work in His way and in His time. When we do that, we find that His plans for us are much bigger and better than the plans we had for ourselves.